穿透記憶傷痕─曾詩涵彩墨創作論述

Abstract

生命充滿著未知的變化，每一天我們會經過許多地方，並從中獲得不同的訊息與體驗，這些存在的記憶經常伴隨著所接觸到的能見世界，而產生情緒反應，在筆者的童年中有很長一段時間，所處的環境經常發生與家人之間的爭執和互相傷害行為，這些目睹的事件，在心中形成一種懼怕的記憶。在本研究中，針對回視的記憶片段，去探討記憶的特徵，記憶的感受性，藉由相關的心理學來敘述，並回顧自身經驗所帶來的恐懼與創傷，以諒解的心態，抽離記憶的角度來觀照內心。再以重新回觀傷痛記憶與當下的體察，運用在藝術創作上，並介紹幾種創作模式的實踐，以及創作的面向，對作品內容作深入的分析，藉由藝術創作的方式，去呈現回視過往記憶傷痕的體察與內心的感悟。在結論中，發現了在創作中因為心境的改變而有色彩上階段性的變化，以及創傷記憶會跳躍性地在不同時期出現，新技法的發現也讓創作的題材與心態有新的發展，透過此次的研究，在作品中呈現了內在心境的質變過程。

Life is full of unpredictable changes and some of them transfer to memory from things we feel and we hear in our daily life. An emotional reaction will occur after the interaction of the past memory and the present world. In my childhood, there were dispute and violence happening frequently around the author, and these scenes has been engraved on my memory. In this research, the characteristic and feeling of the past memory sections have been studied in the view of Psychology, and the trauma and fear from the past experiences have been reviewed with an understanding heart. The observation of those painful memories was used as the topic of the painting. Methods of several skills and aspects are introduced for further understanding of those works. In the conclusion, the author found that color changes in the process of creation because of the mood changed, and traumatic memories appears at random in different periods. The discovery of new painting techniques make subject matter and psychology has new development. Through this research, it presents the process of qualitative change of the inner mind in the works.