凝視存在-劉雁萍自畫像創作論述

Abstract

歷來許多藝術家都畫自畫像，不論表現形式為何，其創作構思多是來自於對身體與意識的感知，然後轉化為藝術語言，傳遞自我的情感。尤其在當代的表現中，更傾向於呈現藝術家自我意識與現實之間的拉鋸。 本研究以「凝視」概念貫穿整個研究內容，首先從探究文藝復興以來，藝術家自畫像的內在意涵著手，以了解藝術家畫自畫像在心理層面上的意義。接著以藝術治療的觀點，來探討藝術家在創作自畫像的過程中，經由不斷凝視自我所產生的積極影響。然後分析他人、創作者、自畫像、觀者之間透過「凝視」的交互作用，所引發的「凝視效應」。 在創作的部分，則是以自畫像為創作主題，透過對自我的凝視，探討自身外在形象與內在意識，並運用油彩、壓克力顏料、炭筆等媒材，以具象，或抽象與具象並融的表現形式，呈現自我的存在狀態。最後還能經由創作歷程中不斷與自我對話，釐清束縛自我的原因，面對自己的陰暗面，超越自我，追求更積極自在的人生。Many artists make self-portraits. No matter what form of expression the idea of self-portrait is often from the perception about body and consciousness. It got translated into the art form in order to express the artist's emotion. For the contemporary cases, it is even more about the conflict between the self-consciousness of the artist and the reality. The concept of this entire study is "gaze". I first study the inside message of the self-portraits for the cases after Renaissance and try to understand the psychological meaning for the artist to produce one. Secondly, from the art therapy perspective, I try to study the positive effect during the process of making self-portrait by constant self-gazing. Then, I analyse the "gazing effect" from the interaction of "gazing" between third party, artist, painting, and audience. For the production, my topic will be self-portrait to discuss the physical form and the awareness inside. Oil, acrylic colors, and charcoal will be used as media to express the aseity in the concrete or partially abstract way. Through constant self-dialogue during the process of making self-portrait, I can clarify the cause of self-limiting and face my own dark side; then further overcome it in order to seek for a more positive life and set my life free.