從追尋「新宗教」回歸「此地此刻」:吳爾芙「達洛威夫人」中經驗之當下性

Abstract

本文旨在探討維吉尼亞．吳爾芙小說「達洛威夫人」中不同層次的心靈狀態。內文共分兩部分︰第一部分試著解釋，在執著地追求一個客體化的自我形象與外在真理的慾望駕馭之下，自我逐漸僵化與空無化的過程，第二部分則說明，惟有全然融入當下的具體經驗，使活躍的自我意識退居幕後，才能享受充盈的生命。在小說中，相較於自我意識高漲的男性角色，達洛威夫人擁有更流動而豐厚的生命，因她活在此刻，隨方就圓，不欲將所遭逢的絕對他者納入其主體性。 本文第一部份援引柏格森關於意識無法捕捉的內在流動自我之理論，以及萊因關於自我分裂的心理學分析，試圖勾勒小說中所呈現的，內在流動的自我之形貌及其對意識產生的影響。此一部分的自我，並不能區分成個別獨立的元素，故無法納入由個別符碼組成的符號系統，因此也無法為意識所捕捉而納入主體性。因此這流動的自我成為一絕對他者，一個永遠無法觸及的自我形象。對強烈自我中心的意識而言，它威脅了主體的完整性。若意識急欲認知並進一步與他人溝通這內在的他者，將會落入納西色斯式的自我閉鎖且逐漸耗損，終至空虛。將此內在的絕對他者納入主體性的慾望，會使擁有自我意識的生命陷於無法與其他生命交流的困境。在本文的第二部分我將指出，小說中對達洛威夫人的心靈描寫，提供了另一種生命的模式—自我意識的退讓，並融入當下、實質的經驗。達洛威夫人與他人和外在世界的關係正是馬丁布伯所闡揚的「我與你」的關係，也就是在遭逢生命中的絕對他者時，不強加主觀的意識。唯有在「我與你」的關係裡，我們能享有完整與充盈的自我。The goal of this study is to explore the different levels of mentality represented in Virginia Woolf’s Mrs. Dalloway. The study is divided into two parts: in the first part I attempt to explain how the obsession of the self-conscious being with the objectified, unreachable self-image and the truth of the world leads to the rigidity and annihilation of the self, and in the second, to argue that only through the involvement in the immediate, concrete experience with nonparticipation of consciousness can the self-conscious being enjoy a fulfilled life. The discussion will lead to a conclusion that Clarissa Dalloway lives a more fluid, abundant life than the self-obsessed male characters, for she enjoys floating in the present moment with the odds and ends of the external world, not attempting to include the opaque absolute other into her subjectivity. The discussion of the first part is based upon Henri Bergson’s illustration of the unrecognizable inner flux of the self and R. D. Laing’s psychological analysis of a split self. In this part I will examine the depiction of the effect of this inner flux upon consciousness in the novel. This unrecognizable part of the self that is undifferentiated into distinct elements cannot be included into subjectivity through symbolic representation. Thus it becomes an absolute other, an unreachable self-image that, for an egocentric consciousness, threatens the completeness of subjectivity. Being obsessed with the recognition and communication of this inner other, the consciousness falls into a narcissistic state and gradually diminishes into nothing. The desire to include the absolute other into subjectivity traps the self-conscious being in an impasse of incommunicability. In the second part, I will read Clarissa Dalloway as a representation of an alternative mode of living—the nonparticipation of consciousness, the involvement in the immediate experience. Clarissa’s relation to other people and the external world embodies Martin Buber’s “I-You relation,” a relation to the absolute other without imposing, a relation in which one can be completed and fulfilled.